Friday, 27 June 2014

Great Pan is Not Dead

When light goes down and darkness rises
And naught is left save breath and shadow
And the chill caressing sigh of wind;

When moonlight covers all in hoary grey
And blunts the edges of day-time shades
Dissolving blues and reds to silver-white;

When the world tilts and heaves and shudders
And the sky fills with an electrical promise
And the air is thick enough to wrap around you like a fleece;

When beasts bay and eyes blaze in the distance
And silhouettes seem to melt out of every pool of night -

When fright beats a staccato cadence in your blood
Yet curiosity drives you to deeper into the dusky shade -   

When the twisting of the paths make your feet lose their way
And yet even in your terror you find a great beauty in your fear -

You will know then that Great Pan is not dead,
He but only waits for you in the wildest places of your mind.

Wednesday, 28 May 2014

Enlightenment Within a Lightning Bolt

A flash within an ink-dark sky -
And for the barest breath,
A span of time so slight
That it dares perception to perceive it -
All is illuminated,
And known,
And named,
And one;
‘Till darkness reclaims darkness
And all that remains is the imprint of understanding
Emblazed and taunting,
Deep within the echoes of the mind.

Monday, 10 March 2014

A Meditation on Wind Chimes

I really hate being cold
(No, you don’t understand…. I REALLY hate being cold. I really, really hate it.)
And tonight it was freezing outside
And I was standing on my balcony in a t-shirt, drinking a whisky and coke.
(Shut up, I had good reason. And I had a blanket wrapped around me at least; and I even had slippers on.)
But the cold is not what’s important, what’s important was the wind chimes.

The sound of the city at 3 a.m. (that almost subsonic, collective roar/buzz) and the sound of silence (rare and fleeting, but thankfully still occasionally possible where we live) mixed with the sounds of the wind (the low howls between buildings and the high pitched whines where it screeches through the trees). 
They were all just backing vocals for the wind chimes.

The ones on my balcony didn’t budge. 
It was the song of some random chimes, in an unseen neighbourhood backyard, unheard ever before tonight that was what was important; that was what kept me rooted out there in the cold, happily enthralled and happily transfixed.

The sound was way more intoxicating than the drink I held in my hands could ever be.
I had to stay to listen to it, I had no choice.

Random bursts of wind randomly hitting randomly placed pieces of metal.  The song could never have been pre-ordained, and yet… there was…. a symmetry to the sound, a patternless pattern, one that prodded at a deeper part of my brain. 

And I was reminded then, that even Chaos itself still seeks to express itself through the beauty of creation.

Monday, 3 March 2014

By Revel Revealed

I boil the wine
And mull it with blood
And drink till it runs down my chin
Staining my breasts red and dripping onto the hard-packed earth where my feet have danced

I fling my head back
And howl into the void
Daring the night to embrace me
And in the darkness see visions of rent beasts and the mask of Life fall away to reveal Death’s pitiless grin

Parched with sanity
I slake my thirst in madness
And drop my self aside to find my Self
And in the wild, frenzied raving find a calm centre of harmony that bestows true peace

I collapse, shattered and empty
Bone weary and muscle strained
Barely able to lift my limbs
And I smile, laughing with joy and elation at the beauty of this insane world

Fervour Ekstasis

A whisper, like ivy tendrils
Caresses my mind
And makes me shiver.

I see the God in his eyes,
Smell Him in his sweat,
Taste Him on his skin.

I feel Him in his fingers.
My sight turns to mist
And drum beats echo from far away.

I slip, slide from his embrace 
And fall into His
Through smoke and wine and madness.

In frenzy, I feel the need to scream,
To dance, to roar – We are lions! –
The need to tear flesh and wash it down with blood.

I fall from myself
Deeper and madder and to a darker place;
I fall into silence.

I fall before Him,
Desire set upon the altar of my flesh;
My thoughts of Him alone.

My obsession, my dream, my Muse-man.
In bondage to His glorious call
I drink of His inspiration -

Fill me, O God, with Your heat
And when the flames consume me
Lead me to be reborn. 

Horned is the hunter

Horned is the hunter
And horned is the prey
For he who takes the offered life
Is also he who’s slain

He who is the offerer
Is the offering
and the prey’s blood dripping on the ground
In the hunter’s veins does sing

Crowned is the victor
And crowned in defeat
For the life that leaches from the prey
In the hunter’s heart does beat

Summer’s Lord and Winter’s
Death and life, night and day
The cycle carries on and on           
The hunter is the prey

Divine Irony

The gods do dream in mortal shape
And walk among us while we’re awake
Yet while we sleep we yearn to be
Like those who crave mortality
The sorrow we shun within our lives
Our pain, our fears, our hopes and lies
The gods seek out and they embrace
All that which we fear to face
The pain of love, of birth, of death
They yearn to feel with every breath
And while we long like them to be -
They envy our humanity.

Fridge Magnet Anthesteria

You whisper;
       And I -
Joy drunk,
Fall from your mad embrace
Through milk and honey and warm ecstasy.
My blood trembles
And fevered visions flood from your fierce worship

Prayer to the Muses

Sisters of the spoken word
Ladies of all artistry
Nymphs of Mind who ride ones thoughts
Who give and offer, tease and taunt
Born of storm and memory

I call thee Ladies, to inspire
The graceful, glorious, gifted Nine
I Name thee Muses and call ye forth
To imbue my Craft with creative force
To give shape to what I can’t define

A Dream of Apollon

I dreamt last night,
Of hazel eyes
And the smell of bay leaves burning.

You knelt above me
Music in your touch
Playing upon me like on the strings of a lyre.

Blazing like the sun,
Your golden gaze drew me forward
Like a bloom searching for heat.

You tasted of honey,
Parting my lips with your tongue
And setting my flesh aflame with your kiss.

I dreamt of you,
Lying with me in a noon-warmed field,
As sunlight chased patterns over our glistening skin.

I dreamt of you
And woke with the warmth of sunshine
Clinging to my spirit

Medusa, My Love

My Lady of the oceans' steep
High cliffs;
Those built up with
The bones of all who've
Looked upon and seen
Thy face alight and shining bright
With terror,
Beautiful and fair;
And whose eyes that hold
Reflections now of me.
I stare as though, I've turned to stone
In thrall to thee
I give myself, breath and soul
To thee in offering.
And offer forth my life, my flesh
My joy and suffering,
To gaze from now
To the end of time
Upon thy mystery.


Stomp and slither;
I thrust and grind my ego down with the thick dripping drumbeat.
My blood rises; the bass line beating my body in waves of sweat-soaked sound
(I haven't danced like that in far too many years).
Hot breath and warm hands caress my skin and pull me into a strangers pulse
And I loose myself in lust-darkened eyes
And the press of hard flesh against my form.
A fierce fever takes me as I melt into a kiss.
Within the flames we find abandon,
Unburnt yet not unscathed;
And your dancing makes me almost wish the music would never end.

My Eros, My Incubus

In darkness,
In blackest night with curtains drawn
I feel you near to me;
A weight made of thought and a thousand desires.

You whisper,
A deep honey voice seeping into my flesh,
Your breath heating my skin
With words of wicked deeds and promised pleasure.

My thoughts 
Swell to overwhelm my senses -
Your scent, the taste of your sweat,
The pulse of your heartbeat pressed against my chest.

Phantom hands
Glide over my skin, trailing after my own.
I can feel your tongue parting my lips
As I fight to hold your face in my memory. 

I ache
With the echo of you inside me.
I yearn to feel your weight upon me
Moving within me as you do in my mind.

My Eros,
My incubus - haunting my dreams
In blackest night with curtains drawn
Do your thoughts ever drift to me?
Do you hear me call your name?

Memories of the Stag King – Ostara Ramblings

The snow falls and magic stalks the Young Stag

He lifts his head, smelling Nature stir

Too young for battle, to old to not attempt

He chases, never catching his quarry

The hunt becomes eternal, replayed in dreams and whispers and half-real remembered scenes

Young Stag becomes King Stag, forever searching for his first spring. 

Know this – I died for you

(An offering for Remembrance Day)

Whether I rest ‘neath the poppies of Flanders Fields,
Or in an Unknown Soldier’s grave;
If my bones are dust under Marathon’s plain
Or I lie below Acteon’s waves
            Know this – I died for you

If I fought with shield and blooded spear
Or with the cannon’s mighty roar
If stalked through burning jungles growth
Or on jet-wings fiercely soared
            Know this – I fought for you

Whether it was freedom we were fighting for
Or land or goods or love
My opponents were as flesh as I
Made of bone and breath and Blood
            Know this – I took life for you

When war is fought and blood is shed
It is no ones victory
But we must protect all that we love
Safeguard home and family
            And I would die again for you

You need not know why I fought
Or where from which I came
You needn’t know how I died  
Or even know my name
            But remember what I gave for you

I traded in my dreams for death
Left behind husband, child, wife
In order to uphold your chance
To live a free and peaceful life
            Be worthy of what I gave for you

It is up to you now to hold the watch
To wage war against tyranny
Weather with weapons or words or protest
You must struggle to remain free
            Do not give up what I won for you

Invocation to the Muse

Lay your lips upon my lips and your hand upon my hand
Let our heartbeats press as close as lovers.
Oh Muse,
Fill me with a desire which only you can sate.
Breathe upon my skin, whisper in my ear;
Let thoughts, slick with passion pour forth.

Hear me Lady:
I offer myself to you, come into me.
Inflame my soul; let your rhythms rise within me,
Let your tongue spill words into my mouth.
Sing through me, My Goddess
As I cry out your glories to the world.


Sun stands stock still like a forge blazing in the heavens
The colours of fields and flowers woven out of its light
Where sea meets sky a heat haze hangs on the horizon
Teasing with glimpses of faeries flying just out of sight

The sun rises strong, but knows its strengths fading
The Horned One accepts His own death with His crown
For from now on till rebirth, the Sun God is waning
To the life of the land the life of the God has been bound

So jump the bonfire and burn away evil
Carry a torch in procession and bless land and home
Gather the garlands and deck all with flowers
Celebrate beauty for its sake alone

Sing of Midsummer's wonder in play and in pageant
Sing of the eternally conquering light
But never forget that the longest day’s laughter
Always lead us back into the dark of the night

Autumnal God

Blood, red upon the leaves of brown
And red leaves lie upon the ground
A crown of oak and berries wound
Upon His head held high and proud
His feet, firm upon the hallowed road

His cloak cast over the glades and fields
It’s shadow causing life to yield
And strength within the seeds to seal
And like the power that He wields
Be kept safe deep within the earth’s abode

Balance never does last overlong
Winter’s silence gives to summer’s song
And summer yields when winter’s strong
The Old God rules now and not the young
And the Young God shall be reborn from old

Lammas Sacrifice

 The corn is cut with a crescent blade
As summers strength begins to fade
The god fulfills the pact he made
For his sacrifice to end his reign

The scythe that brought the harvest in
Cuts his neck and cleaves his skin
Yet he offers it with a willing grin
For by his death shall life remain

His blood seeps thick into the ground
From his hands falls a golden crown
His fate to the fate of the crops is bound
As his strength is passed into seed and grain

Sun-King once, now ghostly pale
We send him off with a mourning wail
Yet too with joy, for his fate entails
That like the seeds he will rise again


            A cheshire smile made of moonlight
            The sound of bones beating the drums
            The hiss of the winds in the willows
            The fading light of the weakening sun

            The wail of the ghosts of the Fallen
            The wail of the Goddess who mourns
            The wail of the Horned One who's offered
            Merge with the call of the Wild Hunt's horn

            Jack o lantern lights flicker in darkness
            The smell of rotting leaves fill the night
            The veil is torn all asunder     
            Giving glances and glimpses of Sight

            The dead and the gone walk among us
            Those who we honour and grieve
            We revel in the grace of the darkness
            During this All Hallowed Eve

A Prayer to Dionysus

Dionusos, send your blessing
Relieve me of my mortal pains
Fill me with your healing madness
Before I drive myself insane

Blessed Bakkhus, bring oblivion
Let me sleep a dream-filled sleep
Send your wisdom-laden liquid
To drag me down into the deep

Eleuthereus, emancipator
Relax my body and my mind
Fill my lungs up with your visions
Show me what I need to find

Nyktipolos who prowls the night
Drown out my hurt with ecstasy
Through lust and pain and violent loving
Set my mind and spirit free

Kharidotes – who brings grace
Inspire me in words and rhyme
Ease the passage of my thoughts
And turn them into flowing lines

Dionusos send your blessings
Let me see with mystic sight
Let me wander in your shadows
Until I’m ready for the light

Storm Crossed

(a poem for Zeus)

A deep-throated rumble stirs the heavens
And with a nod, the earth shakes
His storm grey gaze summons me
And I surrender.
I fall, as so many before me have
Into love, lightning-quick.
My will, my reason,
Brushed away by the barest hint of his lips against mine. 

A Heart to Cleave To

(A poem written for the beautiful wedding of two friends)

To find a heart to cleave to
A soul to delve within
Warm flesh to lie beside at night
To stare into anothers eyes
And see yourself therein

To find heaven in a simple touch
And hell within goodbye
To hear your name upon their lips
Be greeted with a single kiss
And feel your soul take flight

To have fasted your fate unto another’s
To have two lives merge into one
What other blessings could I offer thee,
Greater than what you share between,
Greater than the beauty of your love

I Want

I want to hear what darkness sounds like.
To see the shapes that silence hides.
To feel caresses of the hurricane,
Walk beneath receding tides.
Everybody’s secrets are the same ones,
Deep down we share the lies.
You can tell another’s deepest feelings
If you would listen to their eyes.
I want to see the setting sun
Drift down into the east;
See waves erupting from the mountain
See flames upon the seas.
Our desires are not different
Childhood fantasies though were grown.
The faces that we see of other’s
Are reflections of our own.
I want to dance upon the clouds,
And feel the coldness of the flames;
To hear the song the stars do shine
And feel the dryness of the rains.
We scream our fears aloud in whispers
And disguise our pain in sight.
We see ourselves as clothed in shadow-
Where others see our light.
I want to taste the rainbow’s colours,
To see the breath inside the gems,
To climb the ladder made by moonlight.
To be known for who I truly am.
We all want to be ourselves,
To love and to be loved,
Want to feel that feeling- that elation-
When the impossible is done.

The Lash

Far easier it is to embrace the flames and find solace, phoenix-like;
To rise from ruin, reborn,
Than struggle on though middle ground safe and yet unsound.

I seek not to be consumed but transformed -

The lash of flame engorges my spirit, drives me to new desire.
Each pain, embraced, goads new knowledge – of self, of gods, of man;
And deep within my servitude I find liberation.

In each sudden, blinding flash swims visions
And I see myself most clearly, as if reflected in the mind of god
Spread across the deep expanse of eternity and filling the universe with my rapture.

By Red and Green and Sacred Things

By red and green and sacred things,
Through wine and weed and words -
A call that only I can hear,
My thoughts within me churn.

A deafening silence within me rings,
Words tumble from my lips,
The spirits of the world draws near
And hold me in their grip.

By sounds and signs and images
Transcribed upon the page,
Of ecstasy and love and lust
Of sorrow, pain and rage.

The liquid passes o’er my lips,
His red-blood fills my veins,
The smoke expands within my lungs;
And reality does wane.

I spin and dance and leap about
And yell and prophesy;
The veils of space and time grow dim
And rend eternity.

The worlds collide and overlap –
Heaven, Earth and Hell.
I walk on old and shadowed roads
Ones that he knows so well.

Truth and lies and in between
Twist and fuse and merge,
Whispers shout into my ears,
And fantasies emerge.

My body aches and yearns and longs –
I hunger for his kiss.
His scent excites my flesh and soul,
His touch brings fear and bliss.

These gifts given from my Lord
Teach of secrets and unseen
Granted by the power of
Words and red and green.

Elemental Prayers

Earth and Stone
Bread and Bone
Kin and Kind
Hearth and Home
To Earth I call
Uphold me
Grant me strength
And prosperity

Sea and Wave
Love that Saves
Hope and Heart
And all we crave
To Water I call
Purify me
Grant me grace
And beauty

Wind and Air
Thoughts we share
Life and Light
Youth so fair
To Air I call
Advise me
Grant me truth
And the gift to See

Heat and Hate
The need to create
Flame and Fire
Passion Great
To Fire I call
Consecrate me
Grant me power
And nobility

Two Roads

Would you risk all that you are
To try to know yourself?
Would you walk the paths of hell,
Or die, screaming to get out?
You speak of hope and goodness,
And of purity and of peace.
But darkness lives within the light-
Clawing for release.
You travel on the highest roads,
And bask in brilliant light.
But of their sisters far below-
You deny knowing of the night.
You miser away your hope and love;
And scream of poverty.
You claim you have a wealth of thoughts,
Others just cant see.
Face to face with true magic,
Would you even know?
Death is part of the sacred plan
And darkness needs to grow.
Embrace the cauldron of the Crone-
And look into its deep.
Laugh as madness takes you home;
And leads you to escape.
Run with wolves in the darkest night;
And try to tell me then
That the Goddess is all hope and love
And doesn’t deal in death.
You speak to me of balance,
But do you understand the scales?
For without the heat of the flames,
The fire would surely fail.
Light and darkness are not two-
Life and death are one.
And you must travel on both roads,
Before your journey can be done.


Frogs croaking in the wilderness
Echo through the night;
Shadows hang off spear straight pines
Distorting sound and sight.

Dew drips down from up above.
A deep drum beats in the dark
Swelling fear and panic,
And joy within my heart

The forest circles round me
And calls the animal within,
Stalks the savage in my mind
With flashing eyes and bloody grin.

The dead fly by as butterflies,
Sigh in the buzzing of the bees.
Nature murmurs into my ear
Through the creaking of the trees.

Their message washes through me -
Life is a wondrous feast;
But we must wildize the civil side
            ‘Fore we civilize the beast

Hellenic Prayer Beads and Prayers for Each of the Gods Represented

This is my set of prayer beads; each bead represents a deity in the Hellenic pantheon (and Inanna, who is Sumerian).

This is which deity each bead represents, starting with the bead symbolizing Hestia (Hestia, thine is always the first and the last)

Inanna of the Thousand Offices

The name Inanna is one of the oldest known recorded names for a divinity worshiped by human kind and the figure of Inanna is one of the oldest and most influential goddesses in human history.  She is the holy virgin and the sacred whore and may have initially been named Nin-anna, which is translated as ‘lady of the sky’; she is among the earliest divinities to be associated with the planet Venus, in both the Morning Star and Evening Star aspects.

Inanna is the Sumerian "Lady of the Thousand Offices", a goddess of love and sexuality, of war and bloodshed, of magic and ritual, and of the qualities that define culture.  In fact many of her primary sites of worship were centered in the earliest sites of cities and civilization – Uruk chief among them, and her temples there were sites of commerce, craft and worship


Though known primarily as the god of grapes and wine, Dionysus or Dionusos is a god of many functions and forms.  He is the (semi-) respectable patron of the theatre and actors, as Greek drama developed out of the masked rituals and celebrations in which his life was acted out by and for his followers.  (In fact a mask was often used as an idol for this god, carved out of vine or fig wood).  In this guise Dionusos is a god of civilization and peace and community.   Dionusos is also the effeminate yet phallic, savage mystery-god who leads his followers – the wild maenads (the ‘raging ones’) – in blood thirsty festivals, ripping animals to pieces with their bare hands and dancing all night within the flames.  Dionusos is also a fertility god, worshiped along side Demeter; where she is the solid, receptive force of nature he is the liquid, active aspect.  Dionusos is a divine saviour who dies for mankind and is reborn, and through eating of his flesh and drinking of his blood humanity is granted eternal life in paradise.  Dionusos presides over communication with the dead, over euphoria, insanity, fear, liberation and intoxication.  Dionusos releases from the mundane and allows the breaking of society’s rules and through his intoxicating possession he grants his followers the ability to perceive the world from a divine point of view. 


Athene, favourite child of Zeus is the goddess of wisdom and wits and cunning, of war and warriors and of invention and homecrafts.  Athene was the weaver of the gods as well and took great pride in her skills and abilities even punishing mortals who had the hubris to compare their work to her own.  Athene also is credited with many inventions that ease the work necessary for survival, including the bridle, trumpet, flute, pottery, the rake, the plow, the yoke, the ship, and the chariot.